Forgive and Forget
by GregTH. The Eleventh Espada
Summary: Betraying the Wandenriech and changing sides saved a lot of people, but it did not improve anyone's opinion of him. Jugram Haschwalth quickly learns that being forgiven for past actions does not mean they have been forgotten.


"This era...our era is over, I have put all my faith...all my hopes into Ichigo Kurosaki and Uryu Ishida, they shall lead the Quincy into a new age. For 1000 years we purged from the darkness...now it is time to extinguish the dark"

_These were the last words of Jugram Haschwalth before he left them all behind_

_and charged at the ones he had called comrades for over a thousand years_

.

.

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His actions and his words that day do not haunt him, deep in the confines of his heart, he knew his actions were just

He had betrayed the Wandenreich, abandoned his beliefs and army that day

Truth be told, he still wondered what drove him to switch sides that day, perhaps his sense of right and wrong had finally kicked in.

Either way, that day was the day when Jugram Haschwalth turned against the Wandenreich

He charged into the advancing army of remaining Quincies, his sword cutting down three of his ex-allies within the first few seconds. Locked into a battle that did not end until Yhwach himself was purged

Yhwach...

His..._former _emperor did not learn of his betrayal, he was being dealt with by the aforementioned Substitute Shinigami and "Last-surviving" Quincy in the world of the living when he turned

Perhaps he sensed it...realizing it moments before he died that his own adviser and grand master of his precious Stern Ritter had abandoned those he stood beside for 1000 years.

Had His Majesty been there, Jugram Haschwalth would have met a worse fate the Shigikune Yamamoto.

But his death would have to wait until another day

Blackened skies parted, tyrant waves of the ocean calmed and the sun shone on the beginning of a new day

The first day in over one thousand years where there was no Wandenreich

And the first day in one thousand and five hundred years that there was no Quincies

The power came from Yhwach's blood, with the man dead, the powers died with him

Uryu Ishida, Ryuken Ishida and even Haschwalth himself were just regular humans now

His ex-comrades expressed shock and horror as their very powers vanished and their crosses crumbled before their very eyes but he did not, he was Yhwach's direct adviser. He knew what the others did not.

His comrades, whatever was left of them, were arrested by the Shinigami on the spot

He was surprised to find he would no be joining them in the rotting confines of Muken

He had been granted mercy at the hands of Shunsui Kyoraku, a man who he had faced in direct combat, a man he sought to _kill_ only days prior to end of the war

But the former Quincie's change of heart, combined with his new-found humanity was apparently enough to be granted forgiveness

But his actions would never be forgotten

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.

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**"GOOOOD MORNING JUGO!"**

***CRASH***

**"ACK!***

Jugo...how he loathed that nickname

Why, and quite frankly _how _Bazz-B came up with it was beyond him

His name was _Jugram_, where did the 'o' come from?

Needless to say, it irked him more that the ones he now lived with now insisted on calling him it

But that was the price to pay if he was going to be living with the Kurosaki's from now on

After his surprising pardon from his crimes, he was offered, nay _ordered_ to live with the family

Having no where else to go and not fancying to wait around and see if the Shinigami would change their mind and throw him in prison, he accepted

And with the move came the baggage, namely Isshin Kurosaki. A man who insisted on waking him with a dropkick every morning

A dropkick that _missed_ every single time and had now robbed his room of a glass window

It was going to happen sooner or later...

With a sigh of exasperation, he stepped out of his bed and stretched his numb joints

Heh..._his _bed

This bed did not belong to him

This room did not belong to him

Nothing in this house belonged to him

He slept in the place where Ichigo Kurosaki once slept, having taken his old room

Kurosaki obviously no longer required it...

After waking up, it was off to eating breakfast

He appreciated the food he was served each and every day. Back in the Wandenreich, food consisted of little more than colored slop and non-colored slop, to indulge in something as suculent as bacon and eggs was almost majestic.

After breakfast, it was off to his new job

Yes, job

A firm knowledge of first aid had resulted in him being appointed as Nurse in the Kurosaki clinic

He had a lot to learn in the field but he was always a fast learner and some knowledge about how this new home worked _would _suffice

He had learned to stay away from Yuzu when she was preparing food as asking her how a salt shaker worked as she was preparing dinner somehow resulted in several long blond hairs being found in that nights casserole

He also learned not to engage Karin in a foul mood, long behind that one

Throwing on the white doctors coat each and everyday threw him right back to the days of his white military uniform but he assured himself that those days were long gone

He was no longer a warrior of the Wandenreich, Kisuke Urahara had settled him with a new identity

In reality he was Jugram Yatoli Haschwalth, born 986 A.D in Baravia, Germany to merchant Val'or Ich-To Haschwalth whose family had emigrated from the small town of Treva (now known as Hamburg) after escaping the destruction of the city by Vikings in 845 A.D and Turkish native, recently escaped slave Ege Rogira Chitauri-Ahaz, who were the victim of a hollow attack that he himself would have perished in had it not been for the arrival of the Quincy King himself, Yhwach. Travelling the world in the what would become unknown in written history as the Great Quincy Crusade, from the moment on, all Quincy, _especially _himself swore supreme allegiance to Yhwach

Now however, he was Jugram _Micheal _Haschwalth, born March 14 1986 in Berlin to German physicist Chrishtopher Haschwalth and and his London-born wife, acclaimed surgeon Emma Lawrence-Haschwalth, He attended Harvard which he graduated from with high honors but the pressure of being a head doctor unnerved him so he traveled the world, settling down in Karakura and settled for being a part-time Nurse in a small clinic.

It was convincing lie to whoever asked and next to no one in the material world knew who he truly was...

But he knew who stood before him in the mirror, he knew what the person had done...

He knew his parents were long dead, he knew his true home was long gone, he knew his true age...

But that person was no longer him...

The new Jugram Haschwalth sought to help, he had treated more than a few severe wounds during his short time working here and was praised for it and for some reason, female patients were oddly nice to him...

His inner turmoil would have to wait, Dr. Kurosaki was calling him in

.

.

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"Why can't it be white? _I like white_"

During his time in Karakura, Haschwalth discovered something that annoyed him far more than Bazz-B ever did

Clothes shopping

"Because white just isn't fashionable Jugo-san" Came the response of the young Yuzu Kurosaki

_There was that damn nickname again_

"But I like wearing white" He pined on, sounding like a little child

"You don't wear all white" Karin Kurosaki, who had joined them on this trip, pitched in "'Just isn't right"

Haschwalth was about to protest some more before realizing she had a point

After all that had been done, maybe it would be best to set aside the white

"Well...how about this?" The blond ex-Quincy asked as he picked up a nearby shirt

The most hideous bright yellow checkered shirt Yuzu or Karin had ever laid eyes on

"Perhaps you should leave this to us Jugo-san" Yuzu said kindly as she gently pulled the shirt from his hands

"Maybe you should wait outside" Karin mentioned

The found no protest from him as he quickly exited the store, leaving it to the two young girls

He did become deathly pale however as they returned however, as nearly all clothes they returned with were solid black

.

.

.

He was never big on sports, but he didn't see any reason to refuse Karin's invitation to watch a soccer match

"YOU IDIOT! THAT WAS A DIVE! A BLATANT DIVE!"

He did now

His fingers were buried deep within his ears, it was needed, her yelling would have destroyed his hearing by now if he didn't

"Is this what you do for fun?" he asked as he removed his fingers from his ears

"It's what I do to unwind" she sighed as she sat back down in her seat "You should try it sometime, you'd be surprised how much stress it relieves"

...

"Very well"

"Huh?"

"REFEREE!" Came the roar of the blond man as he bolted to his feet "THAT ACTION WAS A BLATANT DISREGARD OF THE RULES. YOU ARE A FOOL! BUT YET I MUST COMMEND YOU. CONGRATULATIONS ON DISCOVERING THE SECRET BEHIND FALLING ASLEEP STANDING UP!"

An agape jaw was he only reaction as the blonde man returned to his seat

"How was that?" He asked, a rare glimpse of a smile etched the corners of his face

"Not bad...but next time you might want to wait until the referee makes a call"

The smile promptly dropped dead

"Oh"

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.

.

Another thing he wasn't big on was romance

The only female company he had for over 1000 years was Bambietta and her friends, that killed many Quincie's interest in sexual conduct at all.

So needless to say, not being big on the subject, he was not happy being set up on a blind date by Isshin.

The experience was all new to him, Isshin had informed him of the standard date protocol, movie then dinner

She had picked the movie, nothing more that nonsensical dribble, he expression never changed _confused disgust _

Dinner faired better though, the girl herself was nice, a local medical student, which may explain how Isshin knew her

Rather dashing too he had to admit, chestnut brown hair and deep blue eyes and much like his new identity, a diploma from a fancy foreign college, Oxford, in this case

"So...Jurgam...that's every interesting name"

"Jugram" He corrects her, the response is an apology followed by a small giggle

"It's a very unusual name" He smiled

"It's German" he stated "I was born in Berlin"

"Oh really?" She questioned, looking genuinely interested

"Yes, my mother is English, she-"

"Your Japanese is really good" She interrupted

"Thank you, I-"

"How do pronounce your name again?"

...

"Yu-gram Hash-volt...the last h is silent...so...yes"

"I see..."

"So-"

A quick knee jerk sends the table a few inches into the air, the wine spilling onto the table. Jerking back was the only reaction he could think of as the girl closed her lips towards his

Needless to say it wasn't the best thing he could've done

Her expression screamed of confusion and a little bit of hurt before it turned into one of annoyance

"Great...so either you're not over someone or you're gay"

The girl clearly thought highly of herself to not even considering him not being attracted to her could be a reason

Still...her comment about not being over someone had some relevance

"Well...it wasn't anything romantic but...he-"

"Oh so it's both?!" She spluttered before she stood up and began to leave "I sure know how to pick 'em..."

"No wait!" He shouted as he got up and began to follow her "You don't understand! He was my Emperor!"

That _did not _help

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.

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"Will you ever forgive me for what I've done?"

...

Haschwalth sat on the cold wooden floor, questioning the man before him

"Why do I have to forgive you for?"

His eyes faced the man who had questioned him back

The newly instated captain of Squad 8, Ichigo Kurosaki

"I killed people"

"So have I" Was his reply

"I killed Yasutora Sado"

No visible response came from the man

"I killed Orihime Inoue"

Still no response

"If you won't reply to me then I will just g-"

"I'll be honest here" He interrupted "I didn't give a damn when you switched sides, I just wanted you dead"

...

"I see..."

"But...I've heard about what you did, you held the rest of the Quincy off while me and Uryu took care of Yhwach

You saved a lot of people...if they had interfered, me and Uryu probably wouldn't of won

So...I guess in the end, you saved more lives that you've taken"

Ichigo's eyes then met his

"Forgiving you and forgetting what you did are two completely things, I won't ever forget the fact that you slit Chad's throat or snapped Inoue's neck, If I forgive you, don't think we're gonna become best friends, the fact that you stay with my family concerns me enough"

"I am nothing more than a powerless human" Haschwalth stated "I have no powers, I cannot bring harm to them in any way"

"That doesn't matter, I might not ever trust you...but you've told me that you're sorry...that you regret it, maybe one day I'll forgive you. Maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, maybe never...but no matter what, I will always see their dead faces when I look at you"

Haschwalth couldn't think of a reasonable reply so he only hung his head in shame

"You can apologize every day for the next year and it might not change a thing...but it might wither all I feel about you one day"

...

"That is all I ask" Haschwalth nodded

...

"Tell my family I said hello" Ichigo instructed him "I can't go to human world any more...not since I took that damn power up from the Soul King"

"They miss you..." Haschwalth confirmed to him "I will tell them what you said"

"I see"

"Farewell" Haschwalth nodded as he stood up and headed for the door

"Haschwalth...Thank you" The captain said to departing man

...

Thanks was the first stage

Maybe one day...forgiveness would be on the table

"You are welcome..."


End file.
